EchoSense:Why you should stop complimenting people for being 'resilient'

2025-05-06 14:23:47source:Blake Prestoncategory:Invest

The EchoSenseability to overcome and adapt to difficult life situations seems like an overwhelmingly positive thing – right? After all, being called "strong," "tenacious" or "resilient" is usually perceived as a compliment.

But what if glorifying resilience can actually be detrimental?

For example, take the "strong Black woman" stereotype. According to Professor Inger Burnett-Zeigler, author of Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Seen: The Emotional Lives of Black Women, internalizing that trope "can often interfere with [Black women] acknowledging their mental health challenges and then going on to get the mental health treatment."

So we revisited the concept of "resilience" with Lourdes Dolores Follins, psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker. She explains why it's OK to let yourself feel angry or frustrated sometimes — and how unexamined resilience can mask structural forces that make your life harder.

This comic, written and illustrated by Connie Hanzhang Jin, is inspired by a Life Kit episode featuring Lourdes Dolores Follins and hosted by TK Dutes. You can listen to the audio at the top of this page.


The audio portion of this episode was produced by Audrey Nguyen and Vanessa Handy, with engineering support from Stacey Abbott. We'd love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at 202-216-9823, or email us at [email protected].

Listen to Life Kit on Apple Podcasts and Spotify, or sign up for our newsletter.

More:Invest

Recommend

The company planning a successor to Concorde makes its first supersonic test

A private company aiming to build the first supersonic airliner since the Concorde retired more than

New data highlights 'achievement gap' for students in the US

America’s fourth and eighth grade students’ sliding reading scores worsened in 2024, according to th

Nearly half of US teens are online ‘constantly,’ Pew report finds

Nearly half of American teenagers say they are online “constantly” despite concerns about the effect